It's a good thing I have a sense of humor ...

I had the wildest dreams last night. At one point I was in a hay wagon with Fred and Alton and I was wearing a 1975 27th Lancers rifle uniform. Next I was taking the field as a 27 rifle with a big furry hat that didn’t fit right and I was screaming at everyone that they forgot to teach me the show! Suddenly I was transported to owning a toy store where my sales clerks had accidentally tagged everything at 69 cents and merchandise was flying out the door and I was losing money hand over fist, so I’m screaming at everyone not to sell ANOTHER SINGLE THING and simultaneously warding off a savagely angry, incredibly ugly, sore-encrusted, toothless, Asian woman accusing me of doing the D&D with her husband?!?!?!?!?!?!? What? Needless to say I woke up more tired than I was when I went to bed the night before. When I first woke up I just sat comatose on the edge of the bed for about 10 minutes. I think I might have actually been asleep with my eyes open. Yikes. Stress does really scary, scary things to the brain.

My outlook today is not at all helped by the fact that my feet are positively killing me. It’s so bad that I don’t even want to walk to the copier a mere 15 steps from my desk. It’s because yesterday I was in a particularly stylish mood and decided to sport 3” heels at work. Truly, I don’t know what possessed me. I might as well have stuffed my feet into the paper shredder beneath my desk. Today I’m wearing my favorite clogs and recovery is slow but imminent. As soon as I get home I’m shoving the 3” heels waaaaayyyy under the bed.

I went to lunch today on a quest for three things: gas (for the car, not me), a car wash (because it’s as close to a relaxing bubble bath as you can get in a lunch hour) and a Rodeo Burger (because they’re .99). I handily accomplished all three. Funny thing about the car wash ... there was no dryer ... so my car was still wet when I went through the BK drive through and the BK manager who handed me my Rodeo Burger asked me if it was raining ... despite the sunny, dry day we could both clearly see. I gaped at him for a solid 10 seconds without saying anything before taking the bag out of his hand and driving away thinking “Good grief! Now I know why you work at Burger King”. I then made like Greta Garbo and ate my lunch “alone” in my car. I needed the quiet time after the insane morning zoo that is my job. I was at a point where if one more person spoke to me I was going to tear off their arms and use them to beat them about the head and shoulders. Seriously, I sometimes feel that I’d accomplish just as much with a greater degree of success if I worked with toddlers or trained monkeys instead of this group of “professionals” I work with. I think I may have an inkling of understanding as to what causes people to “go postal” and I’m beginning to think that working here is smothering my spirit … if not killing it outright. The bottom of the totem pole is no place to be. Vent, vent, vent and exhale … that’s what the blog is for.
On my way back from lunch I noticed an oversized delivery van parked in the front of the building. It had the words “EMAIL”,
“PRINTING”, “FAXING” and … “FULFILLMENT” boldly emblazoned on its’ side. Hmmmm … what if “fulfillment” really was something you could get delivered to you out of an oversized delivery van? I know I’d place a big order … how about you?

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